GOD’S INTENDED PLAN FOR MARRIAGE

 

Homily for the Twenty-seventh Sunday in Ordinary Time, Year B

Fr. Ugochukwu Ugwoke, ISch

Scriptural Texts: Genesis 2:18-24, Hebrews 2:9-11, Mark 10:2-16

 

Nothing that God made is purposeless. The author of the book of proverbs says that the Lord has made everything for its purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble (Proverbs 16:4). Like a good engineer, God has a plan and purpose for all He has made. But most often, in order to suit us, we try to change God’s purpose for creation. In our time, one of the aspects of God’s creation that has become increasingly exposed to changes is the marriage institution. In the first and the gospel readings of this twenty-seventh Sunday, Jesus reiterates God’s original design for marriage.

Jesus made the point clearer when the Pharisees, in the bid to test him, came up to him and questioned him about the lawfulness of divorce and remarriage (Mark 10:2). During the time of Jesus, under some conditions, divorce was an accepted practice amongst the Jews. It was regulated by the Law of Moses found in Deuteronomy 24:1-5 which allowed a husband to divorce his wife if he found her indecent in behavior. But Moses only allowed that because of their stubbornness of heart (Mark 10:5). Jesus then quoted some passages found in the creation story in the book of Genesis in order to show God’s original idea for marriage (Genesis 2:18-24).

The first point to note about marriage is that it is ordained by God from creation. The marriage relationship is the first human institution established by God (Genesis 2:24). The second point to note is that God designed marriage as a loyal partnership between one man and one woman. However, in our time, this original plan of God has been distorted in several ways by us humans. Today, in many cultures, marriage is no longer as God designed it but according to our own design. In our age, marriage is no longer between a man and a woman but between people of the same sex; between humans and animals, and in some cases, humans and objects. Also, marriage is no longer between one man and one woman. In our time, we find marriages between one man and several women or one woman and several men. When we do any of the above, we go against God’s original command about marriage.

The marriage covenant is a permanent and comprehensive commitment that is only dissoluble by death. In marriage, a man becomes one with his wife and as such, inseparable from her (Mark 10:8-9). The man and the woman are intended to complement each other. Alone, the man is incomplete. That is why God said at creation “that it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make him a helper suited for him” (Genesis 2:18). The woman is that suitable helpmate. The man becomes complete only when he is joined with the woman. The bond that joins them is love. Love is that lifelong decision to stick together at all times, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, until death.

But when we speak about the woman completing the man through marriage, we have to bear in mind that it is only but a partial completion. No human being can fully complete the other. We find our total fulfillment and purpose only in God. If you expect your spouse to be God to you, he or she will fail every day. Nobody can live up to that expectation. That is why in marriage, there should always be room for imperfections and growth.

In the creation of the woman, God took a rib from the side of the man. The fact that the woman was taken out of the side of the man means that she is to be his helper and companion and not his slave or mistress. The woman is not created to be inferior to the man. Men and women, though not the same, are equal in value. Matthew Henry captures this better when he says that Eve was made of a rib out of the side of Adam; not made out of his head to rule over her, not out of his feet to be trampled upon by him, but out of his side to be equal with him, under his arm to be protected, and near his heart to be loved.

Lastly, procreation and education of children is one of the purposes of marriage. Marriage is a means of serving and glorifying God. By welcoming children and fostering their relationship with God as Jesus demonstrated in the gospel reading, parents and families bear witness to the Kingdom of God. Let us ask God to grant us the grace to be faithful to God’s original idea for marriage. As the author of the book of proverbs says, many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand (Proverbs 19:21).